Just in case the leg humpingly partisan, middlebrow, pseudo-intellectual claptrap Oliver Stone has written and directed over the years isn't enough to convince you he is a wanker for the ages, it turns out that
Alexander is apparently too
gay for him, or us, or something.
In what can only be described as mind numbing denial on par with perhaps John Travolta post "Battlefield Earth" or Kevin Costner post almost-everything the moron has tried to direct, Stone blames the failure of what was almost certainly one of the ten worst films in the last decade on the
gayness of its subject.
"In an interview with the New York Post last week, Stone explained that he was re-editing his disastrous epic Alexander in the hopes that its DVD release would meet with some success minus its gay content. Naturally, I assumed this meant he was excising all scenes of Angelina Jolie purring in a Russian accent with snakes wrapped around her wrists and her breasts at high alert, but, no, apparently he was referring to the emotive sniffling that Colin Farrell and Jared Leto kept doing before heading off into every incomprehensibly filmed battle sequence. (Based on all the urns I've seen, boys back in Alex's day were up to more than wee-wee-weeing all the way home, but perhaps I've misinterpreted the craftsmanship.)
'You cannot associate homosexuality with the military in this country,' Stone told the Post. 'From the day we opened, we did not do
business in the south.'"
That's funny because as I understood it the version of "Patton" with all the ass fucking scenes intact was a big hit down south, but just in case it needs to be mentioned you didn't do business
anywhere.
PS Note to Mr. Stone: the next time you want to make a gay imperialist epic you might try getting a gay imperialist to pen the script. Try Andrew Sullivan, or Dan Savage. You seem to lack the ear for Macedonian plunder.
PPS Isn't it a little bit embarassing for Democrats that a director who has hitched his artistic wagon to the Donkey's ass for so many years to not simply bait gays but literally cleanse his own film of all things homoerotic, or is that all part of the Democratic master plan to throw the queers over the side because a great many of the morons in Washington (not to mention out in the country and the blogosphere) still refuse to believe it was national security and not gay marriage that cost John Kerry the election? Just wondering.